Unfortunately, I can't seem to find this motivation that I've been long looking for. The problem here is that I sensed the urgency, (as if the thought of being retain doesn't scare me enough), but I need something STRONGER, strong enough to make me feel that I REALLY need to or have to clear my Promos.
HELP I NEED MOTIVATION!!!
I blame it on the thinking that: Even if I didn't do well for my A levels and can't make it for Local U, I still have other alternatives. (I know, A levels and Promos are two different things but somehow, the thinking actually affect each other in some way or another.) And its not normal to think like this I tell you.... People will start thinking that I'm insane! Because, choosing Junior College education and not going for University is an act of insanity.
Sometimes I'm so troubled and stressed up (especially when recently, I realised that there are two Aliens namely, Economics and Chemistry has invaded my life!!!) I need to go out and take a breather, so I decided to ask my friends to go out with me. However, It makes me think that I'm committing a sin whenever I asked my friends out. Its either they think that I should be mugging my books at home or I shouldn't stop them from mugging their books.
...
...
...
Ok, leaving A levels and Promos aside...
I'm lost... I'M VERY LOST.
I've been through serious thinking these few days and I realised that I'm gradually over-turning the career route I've planned for myself in the earlier post. (as initially being an accountant then go for mid-career change to be a teacher.)
After those serious thinkings, it has dawned on me that, what I've planned, aren't what I really want. To me, being an accountant seems to be an obligation. Its like I'm obligated to do so. If not, (not depending Net to take over it), AcmeFocus Pte Ltd, will be handed over to a stranger to take over. In which I absolutely DO NOT WISH to see that.
Everytime when mum starts to comment that she is sick of working, wanting to retire, and told me that she has started on her 'spotting possible potential successor - to take over her' mission, actually threatens me. I know Net won't want to take over the company because being an accountant has never crossed her mind at all. So I pinned all hopes on myself to prevent AcmeFocus Pte Ltd from falling into the hands of stranger. So that makes me obligated to become an accountant in the future.
So practically, I don't have a choice... Do I?
OK, enough rantings...
Still have tutorials to finish!
URGH!!!
Jean