Moved on
Got to admit. Tough week, really.
Never thought I would go through the same whole process again this year.
Apparently, I didn't learn my lesson last year after/ when I received my chinese result. Served me right. This time round is my math. (Fantastically my chinese got a perfect A1)
Nothing to explain about, just knew that I've really disappoint a lot of people. I hereby apologise to those people whom I owed. "I am very sorry."
But, no point to cry over spilled milk. Gotta pull myself together. So, actually, it wasn't all that bad. At least this had proven to me that I wasn't a F9 material. (like I always thought I was.) Should be happy shouldn't I?
I should have took notice of my mum's happiness when she received the news of my fantastic chinese result. Instead of her disappointing tone when she heard my math result after that.
All those encouragement from friends motivated me lots.
So, gotta stop fretting about that dumb old mark and look ahead. A new year a new start. A tougher journey awaits me, I should move on.
PS: Adeline, this short english translated summary of my 3 previous post is for you. Hope you understand. :D
Sayonara
Kazuki
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 最终篇∶之后的心情
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 最终篇∶之后的心情
经过了一个星期，心情平复了不少。之前真的很难受，整天得带着一幅事不关己，若无其事的面具面对家人跟朋友，把难过的情绪灌在心里，有够痛苦的。
这个星期真的想了好多，有的没的都乱想一遍，理清了思绪，终于挣脱恶梦，醒了。
我承认，这次的打击对我来说真的很大。自认为没有任何东西能够motivate我时，这个打击竟成为了我发奋的推动力，可见它影响了我不少。
其实再回头看看，我也不是完全失败了。至少我的华文已拼到了一个令我十分满意的分数，而数学已证明我不是F9的料。
昨天我的表妹通过MSN慰问我。很明显的，她注意到了我的MSN username∶ Feeling terrible. 她问我为什么心情不好。当时真不知该怎么回答，因为难过的情绪好像已不再浓烈...不...应该是好像已不再难过了。然后自嘲了一番∶“我到底在难过什么呢？自己都不知道，还有资格告诉全世界自己很难过吗？这算哪门子的道理啊！”为了不让她担心，我爽快的回答∶ "BGR lor"。吓了她一跳。
“再加油把！一定能够成功的！”不知不觉成为了我的座右铭。总觉得，若我抱着这种态度走下去，应该...不...一定会成功的。
我会好好的朝着我的梦想迈进，不让我身边的家人，老师与朋友们失望。
加油吧！
Sayonara
Kazuki
经过了一个星期，心情平复了不少。之前真的很难受，整天得带着一幅事不关己，若无其事的面具面对家人跟朋友，把难过的情绪灌在心里，有够痛苦的。
这个星期真的想了好多，有的没的都乱想一遍，理清了思绪，终于挣脱恶梦，醒了。
我承认，这次的打击对我来说真的很大。自认为没有任何东西能够motivate我时，这个打击竟成为了我发奋的推动力，可见它影响了我不少。
其实再回头看看，我也不是完全失败了。至少我的华文已拼到了一个令我十分满意的分数，而数学已证明我不是F9的料。
昨天我的表妹通过MSN慰问我。很明显的，她注意到了我的MSN username∶ Feeling terrible. 她问我为什么心情不好。当时真不知该怎么回答，因为难过的情绪好像已不再浓烈...不...应该是好像已不再难过了。然后自嘲了一番∶“我到底在难过什么呢？自己都不知道，还有资格告诉全世界自己很难过吗？这算哪门子的道理啊！”为了不让她担心，我爽快的回答∶ "BGR lor"。吓了她一跳。
“再加油把！一定能够成功的！”不知不觉成为了我的座右铭。总觉得，若我抱着这种态度走下去，应该...不...一定会成功的。
我会好好的朝着我的梦想迈进，不让我身边的家人，老师与朋友们失望。
加油吧！
Sayonara
Kazuki
Friday, January 25, 2008
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 第二篇∶拿成绩的心情
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 第二篇∶拿成绩的心情
下午1点多。看见去年的中四生纷纷到来。他们脸上表露出紧张的神情，也不禁让我的心情感到七上八下。这种感觉很恐怖，我真不敢想象。
2点正。我们纷纷到了礼堂，校长开始再次公布整体成绩。为了舒缓我紧张的心情，我并没有注意听校长说话。我便开始东张西望，观察各位老师的表情。我发现在他们严肃的表情背后，都隐约的表露难以掩藏的欣慰及快乐。紧张的心清也顿时放松了不少。
到了分发个人成绩单的时候。好不容易放松的心情又开始绷紧了，可恶。我的编号是12，所以是第12位拿成绩的学生。当快伦到我拿成绩的时候，我的心越跳越厉害，简直可以感觉到它快跳出来似的，十分紧张。再看到好多朋友不知为什么哭红了眼，更加上我了紧张的成份，直冒冷汗。为了放松自己，我必须分散注意力，所以不断的提醒我自己，不管成绩如何，都不可以哭。绝不可以破例，在大庭广众面前哭，多没面子啊！
磨蹭了好久，终于轮到我了。我缓缓走到级任老师面前。心跳指数再创新高，快受不了。再次分散注意力，心想，倘若我晕了过去谁会来救我呀？然后在心里又责备自己，在紧要关头想些有的没的，真败给我了。回到现实中，我安静的看着老师。她问我觉得自己考得怎样，会及格吗？我默默地摇头。之后，她拿出了一张纸给我，然后说∶“不错了呀，你及格耶。”我看了那张纸，数学∶C6，华文∶A1。顿时脑袋一片空白，当时的心情真不知如何解释，只感觉到鼻子一酸，眼泪在眼眶里打转，情不自禁的滑落我的脸颊。我哭了。我的老师见我哭了，马上安慰我别哭。在离开前，她给了我一个拥抱。我的眼泪停止掉落，我很安慰。
回到座位，我默默地独自坐在位置上。想着想着眼泪又再次涌出。我的两位朋友看见我哭，便前来安慰。她们问我到底是为了开心而哭，还是因为难过才哭，我没有回答，只是做在那里一直哭，一直哭。我，不是因为我太过忙于难过，忙于哭才没有回答她们的问题。我是真的不知道我到底是开心还是难过。
我从中一，数学就一直不及格，数学能拿C6，是我一直梦寐以求的呀！而我的华文终于能向所有人证明，我有能力考A1！所以我应该是喜极而泣吧！不过，我又怎么解释我心中那股强烈的愧疚感呢？难道，我对数学的分数不满意吗？为什么会感到愧疚呢？最后，我知道了，我明白了。我要的不止C6而已，我要求更高的分数，我要的不是C6而是A2。我，其实是难过的。
朋友从来没见过我哭，我史无前例的在大庭广众之下痛哭，真把他们给吓坏了。我好难过，Adeline给我一个安慰的拥抱，我抱在她的怀里哭，哭的好惨。终于我的雨暂时停了，不过愧疚的心理不断作祟，压着我好难受，我走向去年的数学老师Miss Leong面前想向她道歉。对她，我可是万分的亏欠呀！还没开口，眼泪又开始在眼眶里打滚，说不到半句，我就开始哽咽了。又哭了出来了，真没用！之前答应自己的事全都忘了。我边哭边说∶“Miss Leong, I got C6 for my math... I am very sorry.” 她不忍看到我痛哭流涕，不断安慰。告诉我∶“不要紧，这次失败了，还有下次。Just work harder next time round... It's ok, no need to cry...”
我心中那满满的亏欠，真的很难释怀。回家的路上，虽然已经不哭了，不过时不时想起之前的事，鼻子还是会一酸，眼眶还是红。我sms了老爸，跟他说对不起。毕竟从小到大，我的数学都是他教的。为了不让家人担心，我必须整理好心情，假装若无其事。我，还是以前那神经质的姐姐，还是那好吃懒做的女儿。不过我是个很烂的演员，在怎么假装，爸爸还是看穿了我的心。他没有揭穿我，因为他了解，我不想在家人面前，表现出一幅不开心地样子。他也只好陪着我一起演完这场戏。
谢谢那些安慰我的人，I really appreciate. Million thanks.
Sayonara
Kazuki
下午1点多。看见去年的中四生纷纷到来。他们脸上表露出紧张的神情，也不禁让我的心情感到七上八下。这种感觉很恐怖，我真不敢想象。
2点正。我们纷纷到了礼堂，校长开始再次公布整体成绩。为了舒缓我紧张的心情，我并没有注意听校长说话。我便开始东张西望，观察各位老师的表情。我发现在他们严肃的表情背后，都隐约的表露难以掩藏的欣慰及快乐。紧张的心清也顿时放松了不少。
到了分发个人成绩单的时候。好不容易放松的心情又开始绷紧了，可恶。我的编号是12，所以是第12位拿成绩的学生。当快伦到我拿成绩的时候，我的心越跳越厉害，简直可以感觉到它快跳出来似的，十分紧张。再看到好多朋友不知为什么哭红了眼，更加上我了紧张的成份，直冒冷汗。为了放松自己，我必须分散注意力，所以不断的提醒我自己，不管成绩如何，都不可以哭。绝不可以破例，在大庭广众面前哭，多没面子啊！
磨蹭了好久，终于轮到我了。我缓缓走到级任老师面前。心跳指数再创新高，快受不了。再次分散注意力，心想，倘若我晕了过去谁会来救我呀？然后在心里又责备自己，在紧要关头想些有的没的，真败给我了。回到现实中，我安静的看着老师。她问我觉得自己考得怎样，会及格吗？我默默地摇头。之后，她拿出了一张纸给我，然后说∶“不错了呀，你及格耶。”我看了那张纸，数学∶C6，华文∶A1。顿时脑袋一片空白，当时的心情真不知如何解释，只感觉到鼻子一酸，眼泪在眼眶里打转，情不自禁的滑落我的脸颊。我哭了。我的老师见我哭了，马上安慰我别哭。在离开前，她给了我一个拥抱。我的眼泪停止掉落，我很安慰。
回到座位，我默默地独自坐在位置上。想着想着眼泪又再次涌出。我的两位朋友看见我哭，便前来安慰。她们问我到底是为了开心而哭，还是因为难过才哭，我没有回答，只是做在那里一直哭，一直哭。我，不是因为我太过忙于难过，忙于哭才没有回答她们的问题。我是真的不知道我到底是开心还是难过。
我从中一，数学就一直不及格，数学能拿C6，是我一直梦寐以求的呀！而我的华文终于能向所有人证明，我有能力考A1！所以我应该是喜极而泣吧！不过，我又怎么解释我心中那股强烈的愧疚感呢？难道，我对数学的分数不满意吗？为什么会感到愧疚呢？最后，我知道了，我明白了。我要的不止C6而已，我要求更高的分数，我要的不是C6而是A2。我，其实是难过的。
朋友从来没见过我哭，我史无前例的在大庭广众之下痛哭，真把他们给吓坏了。我好难过，Adeline给我一个安慰的拥抱，我抱在她的怀里哭，哭的好惨。终于我的雨暂时停了，不过愧疚的心理不断作祟，压着我好难受，我走向去年的数学老师Miss Leong面前想向她道歉。对她，我可是万分的亏欠呀！还没开口，眼泪又开始在眼眶里打滚，说不到半句，我就开始哽咽了。又哭了出来了，真没用！之前答应自己的事全都忘了。我边哭边说∶“Miss Leong, I got C6 for my math... I am very sorry.” 她不忍看到我痛哭流涕，不断安慰。告诉我∶“不要紧，这次失败了，还有下次。Just work harder next time round... It's ok, no need to cry...”
我心中那满满的亏欠，真的很难释怀。回家的路上，虽然已经不哭了，不过时不时想起之前的事，鼻子还是会一酸，眼眶还是红。我sms了老爸，跟他说对不起。毕竟从小到大，我的数学都是他教的。为了不让家人担心，我必须整理好心情，假装若无其事。我，还是以前那神经质的姐姐，还是那好吃懒做的女儿。不过我是个很烂的演员，在怎么假装，爸爸还是看穿了我的心。他没有揭穿我，因为他了解，我不想在家人面前，表现出一幅不开心地样子。他也只好陪着我一起演完这场戏。
谢谢那些安慰我的人，I really appreciate. Million thanks.
Sayonara
Kazuki
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 第一篇∶成绩前的感受
24/01/2008心情交叉三部曲 - 第一篇∶成绩前的心情
我相信。24/01/2008这一天，将会成为我人生中的一段最为深刻的插曲。
我是个中五生。多谢学校给予的机会，让我班上的同学与我都能够参加去年的数学以及华文的'O'水准的考试。所以昨天，对我们来说很重要。
在'O'水准成绩放榜前，不只我们，连全校的群体师生都感到十分很紧张。
还记得去年，因为我们的预考成绩不理想，而'O'水准又日渐逼近，把老师们都给急坏了。那段非常时期，真的给师生们增添了不少压力。尤其当老师们看见我们的成绩还在原地踏步时，想就此放弃的念头便不断浮现。不过，很庆幸的，他们还是坚持到底，没有选择放弃我们。在此谢谢你们。
上午10点多，校长做了一段广播。通过广播，她把'O'水准的整体成绩告诉了全校。惊人的好成绩震撼了全校，震撼了学生，也震撼了校工。不过更震撼了那群辛苦努力的老师们。全校当时传出阵阵的欢呼声，相信也轰动了千里之外的人们。相信他们也一定都感受到了我们的喜悦。
不知道，老师们听到这份喜讯时的心情是怎样的？我觉得他们应该很开心吧？得知曾经认为无药可救的学生，没有辜负他们的喜讯，应该开心到极点了吧？总之我至少可以确定，他们很高兴。
我，不禁深深感动。这就是我的淡马锡中学。这就是我们永不放弃的淡马锡精神。我感到很骄傲。很开心当初我加入了淡马锡这个大家庭，更开心能够一同全校分享这份无与伦比的喜悦。我为去年的考生高兴，为老师们高兴，为我的学校高兴。
加油！淡马锡中学！GO GO TMS~！！！
Sayonara
Kazuki
我相信。24/01/2008这一天，将会成为我人生中的一段最为深刻的插曲。
我是个中五生。多谢学校给予的机会，让我班上的同学与我都能够参加去年的数学以及华文的'O'水准的考试。所以昨天，对我们来说很重要。
在'O'水准成绩放榜前，不只我们，连全校的群体师生都感到十分很紧张。
还记得去年，因为我们的预考成绩不理想，而'O'水准又日渐逼近，把老师们都给急坏了。那段非常时期，真的给师生们增添了不少压力。尤其当老师们看见我们的成绩还在原地踏步时，想就此放弃的念头便不断浮现。不过，很庆幸的，他们还是坚持到底，没有选择放弃我们。在此谢谢你们。
上午10点多，校长做了一段广播。通过广播，她把'O'水准的整体成绩告诉了全校。惊人的好成绩震撼了全校，震撼了学生，也震撼了校工。不过更震撼了那群辛苦努力的老师们。全校当时传出阵阵的欢呼声，相信也轰动了千里之外的人们。相信他们也一定都感受到了我们的喜悦。
不知道，老师们听到这份喜讯时的心情是怎样的？我觉得他们应该很开心吧？得知曾经认为无药可救的学生，没有辜负他们的喜讯，应该开心到极点了吧？总之我至少可以确定，他们很高兴。
我，不禁深深感动。这就是我的淡马锡中学。这就是我们永不放弃的淡马锡精神。我感到很骄傲。很开心当初我加入了淡马锡这个大家庭，更开心能够一同全校分享这份无与伦比的喜悦。我为去年的考生高兴，为老师们高兴，为我的学校高兴。
加油！淡马锡中学！GO GO TMS~！！！
Sayonara
Kazuki
Sunday, January 20, 2008
First 3 weeks of school
First 3 weeks of school
Yup, yup yup. First 3 weeks of 2008 had passe. Hmmmm... What have I accomplished so far??? Well... I had finished revising the whole lots of chapter for my physics, something to be proud of:P. And erm... could solve first 2 layers of my Cubey No.2 without the need of formula:P.
Below are some of the things that happened lately...
1) Got a handsome teacher for my British Council enrichment class. HAPPY!!! Love ya JAN!!!
2) Still watching Hannah Montana and Totally Spies... COULDN'T MISS IT!!!
3) Bought 4 books at one go with my Edusave Award's prize. :D
4) Suddenly, I am very famous among those teachers who had taught me before. Because of a ridiculous rumour...shan't go into that...HAHA.
5) Do nothing during Mother-Tongue Lesson... Coool...
6) Finally finished reading Marley and Me... Nice, wonderful and touching book, almost cried at the end... Thank goodness I didn't, I'm in a public place mind me!!!
7) Too addicted to milk tea. Never fails to drink a bottel everyday.... Well that explains my weight.....
8) Couldn't find Roald Dahl's Genesis and Catastophe.... I want....
9) Still stuggling for Social Studies....
10) Never once completed my music homework ever since the start of the year.
11) Start drawing again...After pausing for 3 weeks... I was wondering when I would start drawing again...
12) Broke Cubey No.3 *Sobs... Cubey No.3 you are a great cube... But don't expect a tribute post for yourself.
Yup, yup, yup. I think thats all...
Sayonara
Kazuki
Yup, yup yup. First 3 weeks of 2008 had passe. Hmmmm... What have I accomplished so far??? Well... I had finished revising the whole lots of chapter for my physics, something to be proud of:P. And erm... could solve first 2 layers of my Cubey No.2 without the need of formula:P.
Below are some of the things that happened lately...
1) Got a handsome teacher for my British Council enrichment class. HAPPY!!! Love ya JAN!!!
2) Still watching Hannah Montana and Totally Spies... COULDN'T MISS IT!!!
3) Bought 4 books at one go with my Edusave Award's prize. :D
4) Suddenly, I am very famous among those teachers who had taught me before. Because of a ridiculous rumour...shan't go into that...HAHA.
5) Do nothing during Mother-Tongue Lesson... Coool...
6) Finally finished reading Marley and Me... Nice, wonderful and touching book, almost cried at the end... Thank goodness I didn't, I'm in a public place mind me!!!
7) Too addicted to milk tea. Never fails to drink a bottel everyday.... Well that explains my weight.....
8) Couldn't find Roald Dahl's Genesis and Catastophe.... I want....
9) Still stuggling for Social Studies....
10) Never once completed my music homework ever since the start of the year.
11) Start drawing again...After pausing for 3 weeks... I was wondering when I would start drawing again...
12) Broke Cubey No.3 *Sobs... Cubey No.3 you are a great cube... But don't expect a tribute post for yourself.
Yup, yup, yup. I think thats all...
Sayonara
Kazuki
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Summary
Summary
Yup, thats it. There goes my one and a half holidays. There goes my games, television shows, movies and all. There goes my "stay up late moments". *Sob*
Just finished drawing my Totally Spies picture, turns out quite nice. Will post up that picture on my gallery blog. :D
Still working on my cartoon... designing characters is a dreadful work and my progress isn't any near completion. :( Drag much???!!!
I am a 100% Disney channel freak. I could stay in the house all day to watch cartoons from Disney channel. But after today, I have to restraint myself from watching it.... dreadful much???!!!
Oh ya, since last year, refurnishing and painting our house had became a family hobby. My mum couldn't stop painting!!!! First day of 2008 and she made me paint the store room's door. Tiring much???!!!
What a summary....
Sayonara
Kazuki
Yup, thats it. There goes my one and a half holidays. There goes my games, television shows, movies and all. There goes my "stay up late moments". *Sob*
Just finished drawing my Totally Spies picture, turns out quite nice. Will post up that picture on my gallery blog. :D
Still working on my cartoon... designing characters is a dreadful work and my progress isn't any near completion. :( Drag much???!!!
I am a 100% Disney channel freak. I could stay in the house all day to watch cartoons from Disney channel. But after today, I have to restraint myself from watching it.... dreadful much???!!!
Oh ya, since last year, refurnishing and painting our house had became a family hobby. My mum couldn't stop painting!!!! First day of 2008 and she made me paint the store room's door. Tiring much???!!!
What a summary....
Sayonara
Kazuki
Happy New Year Much!
Happy new Year Much!
Happy New Year people!!!
School reopening soon, its time to switch myself back to the study mode. So.. bye bye playing and hello studying.... gosh...what a drag...
Can't imagine what I'm going to face this year...Hmmm.... oh ya the O'levels... Gosh the Os were enough to kill me already.... But... BRING IT RIGHT ON!!! I am prepared to face it!!! :P
Alright!!! So again Happy 2008 people!!! Love ya!!!
Sayonara
Kazuki
Happy New Year people!!!
School reopening soon, its time to switch myself back to the study mode. So.. bye bye playing and hello studying.... gosh...what a drag...
Can't imagine what I'm going to face this year...Hmmm.... oh ya the O'levels... Gosh the Os were enough to kill me already.... But... BRING IT RIGHT ON!!! I am prepared to face it!!! :P
Alright!!! So again Happy 2008 people!!! Love ya!!!
Sayonara
Kazuki